12 November 2014

Hump Day Mommy Confessions



ONE.  I will drive suuuuuper suuuuuper slow if you tailgate me. Yep, I’m one of *those* drivers. I will also speed up if you wanna act a dick and try to go around me. Learn to drive already!!

TWO.  As bloggers, or just moms in general, we talk an awful lot about how exhausting motherhood can be, but I wish we’d be honest and talk more about how lonely it can be at times.

THREE.  I would pay an exorbitant amount of money to see Michelle Duggar lose her shit. Just once. That’s all I need. {It’s scary how much the mental picture of this happening in my head amuses me}

FOUR.  I despise Elf on a Shelf. There, I said it.

FIVE.  How is it that I can scream until I lose my voice and no one listens but let me open a piece of candy from 10 bagillion rooms away or super quietly shut the door to the bathroom to try and use it by myself peacefully and everyone and their brother comes running?!

SIX.  I don’t understand why it’s OK for people like Jay Z, Kanye West and the like to drop the “N” word in every other line of their music but someone like Paula Deen is vilified for saying it…decades ago. Is she right for doing it? No. Am I defending her? Absolutely not. Do I think it’s a  whole lot of hypocritical that people will listen to their music and not have a problem with the word but let someone else use it and all hell breaks loose? Yep!! How about this: it’s an awful, demeaning word and everyone could make the world a better place by not using it.

SEVEN.  I’m currently having a huge time relating to parents who refuse to vaccinate their kid{s} or choose to not give their kid{s} a flu shot, but are freaking the fuck out about Ebola and asking to be “vaccinated against it.” Yes, this is really happening and yes, I want to slam my head into a wall every time I hear it. These are usually the same parents who are also freaking the fuck out about their kid{s} catching measles and other diseases yet, no vaccines. SMH.

EIGHT.  I don’t even try to fold the fitted sheet. It comes fresh out of the dryer and gets rolled into a big ball and then stuffed into the linen closet.

NINE.  I secretly love the shocked look on other parent’s faces when I say, “My life isn’t all about my child.” At the end of the day, I’m still me. I have a life, my own interests, and my own likes. I’ve sat through enough Pixar/Disney movies to earn me the right to say, “Sorry, kid. You get to do what I want to do sometimes!”

TEN.  One of my biggest pet peeves is how people use bathroom stalls. It never fails that when I walk into a bathroom, there could be 20 empty stalls and sure enough, the next person who walks in behind me will pick the one RIGHT NEXT TO ME every freaking time. REALLY?! Out of the 19 stalls left, you had to pick the one next to me? Leave some space between us!! IT’S WEIRD!!

What confessions do you have to share for the week?


Courtney @ Shiraz In My Sippy Cup
Courtney @ Shiraz In My Sippy Cup

Courtney is a published author, mom, taco enthusiast, and a Star Wars and Tennessee Volunteers fanatic. She's never met a piece of sushi she didn’t like and enjoys an amazing glass of wine and a great cut of meat. You can read more of her wine-induced, sleep-deprived adventures on The Huffington Post and Scary Mommy.

15 comments:

  1. Holy crap, I love this! I'd love to see Michelle Duggar lose her shit too!

    By the way, totally agree about the public bathroom. Have they never heard, "Beware of fart; stay one apart"?

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    1. O.M.G. I totally fell out when I read that. SO FUNNY!!! But yes, so true. And you're shit out of luck (pun intended) if you catch me on a bad Mexican day. I'm just sayin. Thanks so much for stopping by!

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  2. So you must have been the person in front of me as I was driving to my hair cut last night.... hahaha

    I think Elf on a Shelf is super creepy.... but we don't even do Santa at our house, so I must really be a fun hater.

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    1. No, I think that's great!! I would really be interested in how you do the "No Santa" thing. Seriously. I've been thinking for a while now in trimming out a lot of the fluff to Christmas for Maddy. Do you already have a blog post on this that I could read? If not, I'd love to hear your thoughts!!

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  3. So agree with you on so many of these.

    Except, I do fold my fitted sheets :)

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    1. How??? How do you do it??? LOLOL 'Cause girl, mine always end up looking like a science experiment. Hope you're having a great start to the week!

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  4. Michelle duggar is a robot.

    She HAS TO BE. There's no other logical explanation.

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    1. HAHAHA!! Yes! You crack me up. Hope you're doing good! XO

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  5. I would love to see Michelle Duggar lose it!

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  6. I would LOVE to see any duggar loose their shit! Oh and I totally drive slow slow slow if you ride my ass or piss me off any other way.

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  7. bahaha #10 made me laugh. I've never noticed anything of the sort. But I bet I will from now on.
    Elf on the Shelf just seems like too much work to me. I hope Aria doesn't somehow see it somewhere and think it is awesome.

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    1. Right? It's totally a pain in the ass. I can barely remember my name most days let alone trying to come up with ways to "move the elf" No thanks. Hope you're doing good!!

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  8. BAHAHAHA!!!
    One. Yep.
    Two. Yep.
    Six. AMEN.
    Seven. Yep.
    Nine. Amen.
    Ten. DYING - and, yep.

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    1. OK, your comment has ME dying! LOL. You are the best. Thank you for my laugh this AM. I needed it!

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