19 November 2014

Hump Day Mommy Confessions



ONE.
It bothers me {a lot} to hear straight people say that gay and lesbian couples shouldn’t be able to adopt kids because “being raised by gays and lesbians will mess them up.” As if straight parents have cornered the market on raising perfect little angels. Most of the “challenging kids I don’t like” that I know come from the most uber-conservative straight couples around. You do the math.

TWO.
Unless something needs to be bleached, I usually don’t sort the laundry 99.9% of the time. I used to, but now-a-days? Fuggedaboutit. {Mom, if you’re reading this, please take your nitroglycerin before you have a heart attack}

THREE.
I absolutely detest multi-level marketing. Trust me when I say that I’m not the one to come to when you have some Mary Kay, It Works, Pampered Chef, Shakeology, Scentsy, Stella and Dot crap to get rid of. And if I’m being even more honest, I don’t know how I’m going to handle having to do fundraisers for Chickie’s schools when she gets to that point. I mean, can I just go ahead and put a bullet in my head now? I think back to all the years that my parents had to do that crap FOR 3 GIRLS and I just don’t know how they did it. Begging friends and family to buy crap they don’t want or need? UGH.

FOUR
I don’t like my hands or feet to dangle off the side of the bed because I’m always afraid that something or someone will reach up and grab me. Hello, I’m 38.

FIVE.
When I put on mascara, my tongue sticks out a tiny bit from the corner of my mouth.

SIX.
I usually never wash my face before bedtime.

SEVEN.
Because Chickie usually never sleeps through the night, when she does, I wake up with an irrational fear that something is horribly wrong.

EIGHT.
We are one and done where kids are concerned and take steps to not get preggers but because I’m so paranoid about getting pregnant, I take a pregnancy test every month. Even if Aunt Flo shows up. Have you guys not seen that show ‘I Didn’t Know I Was Pregnant’? Shit is real, y’all.

NINE.
I know a hotly debated topic right now is health care and the affordability/availability of it but really, when can we focus talks on the affordability of food and its costs being through the fucking roof?! Our trip to the grocery store this weekend cost $140 and it seems that our fridge is still bare. This really irritates me to no end. It’s almost getting too expensive to just freaking eat let alone trying to afford the healthier, organic options. Seriously, we live in one of the most plentiful nations on the planet where food is concerned. This shouldn’t be a problem.

TEN.
I’ve witnessed other kids being mean to my child and in each instance, it has taken everything I have to not beat the crap out of them. It takes even more will power when those kid’s parents are there and do nothing about it.

So fess up, fellow moms! What do you have to confess this week?

Courtney @ Shiraz In My Sippy Cup
Courtney @ Shiraz In My Sippy Cup

Courtney is a published author, mom, taco enthusiast, and a Star Wars and Tennessee Volunteers fanatic. She's never met a piece of sushi she didn’t like and enjoys an amazing glass of wine and a great cut of meat. You can read more of her wine-induced, sleep-deprived adventures on The Huffington Post and Scary Mommy.

20 comments:

  1. Yes! Yes! and oh Hell yah!
    I'll buy something from Chickie... I'm the one person who will buy anything from anyone because it's my weakness.

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    1. Excellent! We'll just make you our one stop shop for all fundraisers. No pressure. ;-) XOXO

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  2. NUMBER FOUR. i'm so glad i'm not the only one. but really something could possibly be lurking under the bed.

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  3. Chiming in on #1 - it BLOWS my MIND that people feel they have a right to say who should/should not get married, and who should/should not have children. I seriously don't get it. There are AT LEAST 4 people in my extended family who are gay/lesbian, and they have the most functional/healthy/wonderful relationships I've ever seen, and their kids all rock.
    #5 - tongue is totally out over here, too!
    #9 - how do people afford the 'organic' stuff? For real. I'm trying to finagle a budget with all the off-brand foods, and there are peeps blowing up my Facebook feed telling me all about needing to get on the organic train. Hello, I'm working on jumping on the feed-my-family-without-going-broke train.

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    1. Haha! the feed-my-family-without-going-broke-train! I laugh because it's true and yes! That's us! It's also the reason why our nation has such a hard time getting obesity under control. It's so much cheaper to feed a family on McDonalds than to be able to provide a healthy meal and that's just MIND BLOWING to me.

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  4. I never wash my face.

    Like ever.

    When I get up to pee in the middle of the night I run and jump back into bed because yeah. Something could be under there.

    Oh man. Don't get me started on the multi level marketing. I'm just glad I have well developed the ability to say "NO"

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  5. Seriously, on kids' fundraisers, why can't we just give them money instead of buy crap we don't need/want? But I'll still always buy Girl Scout cookies because WHO doesn't want those?

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    1. YES!!! I couldn't agree more. If the kids need money, that's cool. I get it, but why do I have to sell tons o crap? Direct donations are always great and appreciated.

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  6. I never wash my face either.... sometimes I get concerned it will catch up to me one day, most I say screw it.

    Something under the bed, yup your irrational fear is so not irrational. It still freaks me out. I also get paranoid someone may be hiding under my car :(.

    Separate the laundry? Your suppose to.

    And health care. As one who has just been bent over a barrel by this affordable healthcare act my feelings are pretty out of control right now. I want to write a post to vent about it but I don't think I could control my mouth and my husbands grandma may have a heart attack. But yeah, your right food prices suck.

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    1. Our plans changed a little bit but nothing too drastic. I feel fortunate because I know a lot of people (like you) aren't in the same boat. That sucks, girl. So sorry :( And the hiding under the car thing is real. I've read news stories of that happening, especially during the holidays, and it's unreal.

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  7. I don't sort laundry. Ever. Wash it all on cold. Dry it on whatever.

    And yes, food is freaking expensive.

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    1. Hahaha! You crack me up, Becky. Thanks for stopping by! XO

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  8. Someone told me once that gremlins lived under beds and would bite off children's appendages dare they dangle them over the side...I still don't dangle. And if I happen to in my sleep and wake up that way my heart instantly jolts. Yay.

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    1. Yikes, that's kind of drastic to say that to someone, haha. I'd need a psychologist for that but then again, I just don't handle things like that well. Hope you're having a good week!

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  9. Groceries are out of control! It's crazy and its crazy how much it varies by area. Things are way more expensive here in MI where ppl have no money than in CO. Makes no sense! No idea how ppl feed their families let alone by organic? Don't know how. I get why ppl eat out a lot bc these days it's NOT always cheaper to eat at home!

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    1. Dude! Food in CO was crazy cheap compared to here. Just this weekend I bought a 3 pack of boneless chicken tits and it cost well over $10!!! I thought people bought chicken because it was cheap?! I nearly passed out after I told the cashier she needed to check that price again.

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  10. Do you have an Aldi near you? We do the majority of our shopping there and only spend about $50 a week on the high side. We buy a few bulk items from Costco, like chicken, and do a weekly fruit/veggie run at our local store. I despise spending a ton of money on food, so we do what we can to save. I'm with you on #3, #4, and #10 too!

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    1. Hi Jamie! Thanks for stopping by. No, we don't have an Aldi here. I wish we did though. We had one in Fort Collins when we lived there but we moved and the only thing we have here where we are in GA is the Wal-Mart grocery and Bi-Lo. We're supposed to be getting a Publix so we'll see. Even then, it's still pricey. Thanks again for stopping by!

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