10 December 2014

Hump Day Mommy Confessions



ONE | I think Ryan Gossling is dippy looking. I know so many women have the hots for him but to me, he always looks like a droopy, prepubescent teenager.

TWO | I have ZERO clue how to pronounce “meme.” I mean really. Is it pronounced “mem,” “meem,” or “meh meh” for fucks sake. I have no idea. Do you??

{Side note: I’m showing my age here on this one. The next time y’all here from me, I’ll probably be screaming “Turn down that music already!” too…}

THREE | I’m 38 years old and still have no idea how to use cling wrap properly. I can manage to unroll a piece just fine but after that? Nope. I look like I’m some kind of ninja trying to shew a fly away from my face. In the words of Karen Walker from Will and Grace, “Not sexy, honey.” 

FOUR | I start out most days like a nutrionlist on a diet and end it like a homeless person at an all-you-can-eat buffet.

FIVE | I sometimes sacrifice much needed sleep for just an hour or two more of “me time.”

SIX | We got a great report about Chickie’s progress at school during parent/teacher conferences yesterday and for about a hot second, I felt like that smug, proud mother who thinks their kid will be the next prodigy. Yep, I admit it. And then I saw her pick her nose and attempt to eat it and remembered that she’s just a normal, 3 year old kid.

SEVEN | I hate shopping. HATE it. Whether it’s online or in a store, I’d rather scoop my eyes out with a spoon than to shop. This just proves my need and argument to Michael that I need a personal shopper. He isn’t buying it.

EIGHT | I’ve been playing Christmas music since mid-October.

NINE | I love to dip my fries in mayo and my potato chips in mustard.

TEN | I don’t understand the all-white kitchen rage, especially if you have small kiddos. As if keeping a home clean with kids isn't hard enough. I hear “All-white kitchen” with kids and I immediately imagine what a bitch it must be to keep clean. No thanks.

What confessions do you have this week?

Courtney @ Shiraz In My Sippy Cup
Courtney @ Shiraz In My Sippy Cup

Courtney is a published author, mom, taco enthusiast, and a Star Wars and Tennessee Volunteers fanatic. She's never met a piece of sushi she didn’t like and enjoys an amazing glass of wine and a great cut of meat. You can read more of her wine-induced, sleep-deprived adventures on The Huffington Post and Scary Mommy.

12 comments:

  1. Ugh, I hate all white kitchens too, and my MIL is doing one with her remodel. Um, do you realize your grandkids are going to ruin this???

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly. Stains and hand prints all over the cabinest? UGH. It gives me the heebie geebies just thinking about it. Hope you're having a good week.

      Delete
  2. MeeM! :) And I'll be your personal shopper any day!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ok, so it's meem? long e? I would have never guessed that haha! Geez, I feel old.

      Delete
  3. I love these! And I agree with you on Ryan Gosling. I don't know what the draw is. Me, I'd rather take Channing Tatum or Chris Hemsworth :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. I don't know how to pronounce it either! I just avoid saying it out loud. And I'm also a cling wrap failure. I cannot work with that shit!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank God for the press and seal crap, that's all I know to say because otherwise, NO. Hope you and your beautiful family are doing great.

      Delete
  5. My friend and I were discussing #2 the other day. After a lengthy discussion, we still couldn't figure out the correct pronunciation. :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. The "meme" - LOL - YES! Can someone please pronounce that out loud?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Becky says it's meem with a long e. I still need a judges ruling on this, haha.

      Delete
  7. I'm so with you on this all white kitchen thing. I mean I get it's great lighting for photos but it's just too much and way too many people are doing it! Which is why we didn't for the house.. I'm such a rebel - I hear my 16yr old self calling. If everyone is doing it then I hate it haha!

    ReplyDelete