03 March 2015

What "Me Time" Looks Like Now as a Mom. 6 Hysterical Ways Moms Find Time for Themselves.

Before having a child, “me time” had a completely different definition. It meant long weekends away at the drop of a hat, relaxing dinners with friends, shopping excursions and endless amounts of pedicures, massages and alone time whenever I wanted it.

Let’s all observe a moment of silence for my former freedoms.

Before having Maddy, I can think back to times where I felt bored. I mean, I actually felt completely and utterly bored with nothing to do and honestly, at times, it was glorious. Friends without kids tell me – does boredom still exist? Is it still a real thing? I can’t honestly remember the last time I was truly bored.

Mind you, I’m not complaining. I’m really not however, I can’t help but to think back to my life pre-Maddy and how so much has changed since giving birth. Most of it for the better but some of it? Well, if I’m being honest, some of it hasn’t been so hot – like "me time"…as in, I hardly if ever get it anymore. Not in the traditional “before kids” kind of way at least. Now? Now, it looks completely different.

A hot, uninterrupted shower. Because I’m a working mom, most mornings I’m playing a game of “Let’s see if I can get in and out of the shower before my child wakes up and comes in the bathroom to scream at me that she wants Cheerios” game and nine times out of ten, I lose. On the off chance that I actually make it through a hot shower all by myself without being bothered, I get the terrible feeling that something is wrong because hello! It’s not often that I get the alone time. #truth

Being able to finish a cup of hot coffee. Remember the weekend days of leisurly getting out of bed, strolling into the kitchen and making that first cup of coffee for the day while taking your time reading emails, surfing the web, watching TV or reading the paper? 

Yeah, me neither. 

Those days are long gone and gone with them is my ability to finish one cup of coffee. Usually when my feet hit the floor in the morning, I've played doctor, repair man, boo boo fixer, magician and animal wrangler all before 7 a.m. To actually make it through an entire cup of coffee and to be able to drink it while it's still hot is a rarity and cause for major celebration should it happen in our home.

Staying awake after bedtime. There have been so many times at the end of the day where I just want to curl up in my bed and go to sleep…at 7:30. I keep myself awake though because it’s the only time during the day that I get to myself to do what I want whether it’s catching up on a TV show, blogging, surfing the web or generally just being lazy and useless. Sleep be damned by a mother with a little bit of free time on her hands!

Extended alone time in the bathroom. Moms joke about this one a lot simply because it’s true. Before I had my daughter, I could have never imagined how much of my life would revolve around a toilet. Before having a child, going to the bathroom was a very simple process. Now it has become a refuge…that is until those little Vienna sausage fingers come poking out from underneath the door.

Washing the dishes. The deal in our home is that whoever is cleaning up the dishes and dining room from dinner, the other one has to watch Maddy. I must admit there is something rejuvenating about letting my thoughts wander off to nowhere while I’m elbow deep in Palmolive and loading the dishwasher. Call it what you will, for me it’s called ME TIME.

School pick up. I get off work at 5 p.m. and my office is literally located right behind Maddy’s day care so when I get in my car and park in the school parking lot, I usually sit for 10 – 15 minutes before going inside to get her. I have no shame in leaning my head back and catching a little shut eye in front of everyone before going inside to pick up my child. Shhh, quiet please. Mommy is sleeping.

While we know this list is for a few laughs, we also know there is so much truth behind each of these as well. I know that one day my longing for “me time” will be replaced for more “her time” as Maddy grows and increasingly considers her mother to be “uncool.” So for now, while the need for “me time” is strong, I’m cherishing every moment I have with my little Chickie because I know the days of her pulling away are coming fast and furious.

And really, “her time” is so much better in a lot of ways, don’t you think? 

How do you find little windows for “me time” during your busy day?

Courtney @ Shiraz In My Sippy Cup
Courtney @ Shiraz In My Sippy Cup

Courtney is a published author, mom, taco enthusiast, and a Star Wars and Tennessee Volunteers fanatic. She's never met a piece of sushi she didn’t like and enjoys an amazing glass of wine and a great cut of meat. You can read more of her wine-induced, sleep-deprived adventures on The Huffington Post and Scary Mommy.


  1. I love the fingers under to door! So cute

  2. Haha! This is sooooooo true! :) I can totally relate to every single one of these! But I wouldn't trade it for the world. <3


  3. Yep, I offer to wash the dishes (and do the laundry) WAY more than I used to, since that means my husband has "Mac" duty! :)

  4. I can relate to all of those, especially the shower dilemma!! At times I even decide to go food shopping in the evening once my other half is home just to get some "me time" and get out the house!! Although Ikea is my favourite for that.... walking around a big store taking my time... bliss! ;)

    Fee (greenlovinggirl.com)

  5. I'm finishing my cold cup of coffee from this morning because I don't have time to brew more haha

  6. Oh momma!! Raising your beautiful daughter is more rewarding than finishing coffee :) At least I hope so! Getting in all my coffee time now :)

  7. My daughter is in high school and I am a solopreneur who works from a home-office so I have more freedom now than I used to in terms of me time. But I learned the hard way that I needed to stop judging or feeling guilty about the reality that I need solitude to regain my energy - self care is necessary - even if it does mean taking that ten minutes in the car before you rush in to pick them up after daycare. It's not an either/or situation (ie. either I acknowledge & place value on my needs OR I love my kid/s). Each one of us has to figure out our own best solution...and be kind to other moms as they figure out theirs.

  8. Fashionista's TravelMarch 3, 2015 at 4:59 PM

    This was so funny! I was literally laughing out loud about the sausage fingers!! I don't have any kids but I am a teacher so 9 times out of 10 when I say I have to use the bathroom I just need an escape!

  9. All of these sound totally dreamy to this tired mama!

  10. Desiree @ Macke MonologuesMarch 3, 2015 at 7:37 PM

    Not a morning goes by where I don't have to reheat my cup of joe at least three times. I remember the days when I could brew a pot and quietly sip away my morning. Those days are long gone. However, I wouldn't change a thing.
    I also slip away to Target for a "quick" run when Scott gets home. There is just something to damned perfect about aimlessly browsing each.and.every.aisle with a glorious S'bucks in hand. Basically, it's a mini vacation.

  11. Courtney PattersonMarch 3, 2015 at 8:21 PM

    Oh, most definitely! But I have to keep it real and say that sometimes it can be difficult. We all definitely need a break. Thanks for reading!

  12. Courtney PattersonMarch 3, 2015 at 8:22 PM

    Haha! Then you understand my plight. ;) Thanks so much for reading!

  13. Courtney PattersonMarch 3, 2015 at 8:22 PM

    Thanks, Tracey! I appreciate you reading my blog. Have a good week.

  14. Courtney PattersonMarch 3, 2015 at 8:26 PM

    That is a perfect way to sum it up! Thanks so much for reading.

  15. Courtney PattersonMarch 3, 2015 at 8:27 PM

    Teachers have my utmost respect. Corralling a room full of kids? Yeah, you get mad props! Thanks for reading!

  16. Courtney PattersonMarch 3, 2015 at 8:27 PM

    Don't they?! I'm already promising myself that I will go to bed earlier tonight but it's all lies. ;-) Thanks for reading!

  17. Courtney PattersonMarch 3, 2015 at 8:27 PM

    Thanks for reading!

  18. Courtney PattersonMarch 3, 2015 at 8:27 PM

    Yes, girl! Needless to say, the microwave has become my new best friend!

  19. Courtney PattersonMarch 3, 2015 at 8:27 PM

    Voila! Instant vacation! ;-) Hope you and the family are doing well.

  20. So true. Have to have a balance. Can't go crazy, but have to cherish the kiddo time while we have it!

  21. Having a great chuckle at this as I sit in bed with a kiddo next to me who woke early (yet again) and a reheated cup of coffee. It's 5:45am lord only knows what all we will have done before 7am. No lesiure mornings here either! And that sit in the care at daycare? Yup Monday I totally sat on the bench about 5' away from the daycare at the gym for 10mins to just sit. Ok sure I got to workout alone but the gym never feels like "me" time as much as it feels like something I have to do. Good for me yes. but not me time in the sense of just sitting and thinking alone. :) Great post mama! and I don't think i've said this but I love the new look and all you're doing with the blog! One day I hope to work on growth again (you know when I don't have boxes still sitting in my living room to unpack!) and you'll be top of my list for sponsoring!!!

  22. Lol. The coffee part is SO true. I started drinking a cup of tea after the girls go to bed just so I can drink a whole cup at once. It feels so good.