Letters to Madeline: 15 Things You Should Know About Your Mom

I thought it important to share with you a few honest facts about yours truly. After all, we’re going to be together for a long, long time. Right now, you know me as “mommy” but sweetie, I’m so much more than that person, and you deserve to know the genuine truth of who I am. I’m also Courtney, my own person, and I’ve been living my own life for a long time now – even before you were even thought of.

Dear Maddy,

In as much as this blog is a place to talk about the ups and downs of parenting, life and kiddos, it is also somewhat of a journal for you to look back on to see how much I bitched about not getting any sleep, drinking copious amounts of coffee and my crazy, chaotic life in general as a full-time working mom.

I kid, I kid.

But really, even though my blog has been a journal for me and a way to connect and share with so many other amazing moms, it has also been a vault of treasures for you to look back on and (hopefully) laugh and smile (considering past posts such as this, I can only hope you'll laugh!) Whether it’s good, bad or ugly, you will know it has all been genuine and I think that’s what’s important.

Madeline, you will find that true, genuine people are very rare to find in this world. I often feel smitten when I find people who are honestly able to live life as themselves without apology, excuse or hesitation. To be yourself takes courage, commitment and strength because this world and the people in it will try to change you to convince you that it’s better or cooler to be the “it” thing of the moment.

Don’t fall for any of it. It’s all lies.

Yes, you will go through the awkward stages of figuring out who you really are but once you find yourself, hold tight to it and never EVER let go. Don’t forget yourself.

Along these lines of being genuine, I thought it important to share with you a few honest facts about yours truly. After all, we’re going to be together for a long, long time. Right now, you know me as “mommy” but sweetie, I’m so much more than that person, and you deserve to know the genuine truth of who I am. I’m also Courtney, my own person, and I’ve been living my own life for a long time now – even before you were even thought of. It would be easy to gloss over myself and solely think of only you (which I do to a point) but you deserve to see an example of a woman aiming to live a complete life, just not as half a person. So, for better or for worse, here are a few things you should know about your mom…

…I don’t like odd numbers. I’m pretty OCD about this. I don’t know why or how this came to be but for me, I like things nice and even.

…People think I’m a very outgoing and a social extravert but honestly, I have to work hard to be this way. My natural tendency is to be somewhat private and reserved. I can also be very shy around people I don’t know.

…Growing up, I wanted to be a veterinarian. Then a lawyer. Then the President of the United States. Somehow, I ended up in the marketing and communications field and at 40, I still have no clue what I want to be when I grow up. You could say that I suffer from career wanderlust.

…You were never a part of my life plan. I never thought for a moment that I would have the chance to be a parent. I had resided myself to thinking that I would live a life without children. You were the most splendid, amazing, beautiful surprise of my life. You don’t remind me of all my fears in parenting. From the moment you were born, when I look at you, you have been and will always be my reason for everything.

…In the order of the things I love most in my life, under you, God and daddy comes the great State of Tennessee. This is a love affair that will never die. Your mommy is a Volunteer through and through.

…I’ve been married…and divorced. I’ve learned a lot about love the hard way and while there is a part of me that hopes you never have to, I know that one day someone will break your heart and I’m here to tell you – it will be okay. The pain will come, but it will go and you will pull yourself up by the bootstraps and keep moving forward. You will learn a lot about yourself but most importantly, you will learn for yourself the most important qualities in finding the perfect mate.

…I expect a lot from you. I will ride your ass like Tonto. Yes, I want you to have a happy and carefree childhood but it’s mine and your father’s responsibility to raise you and quite honestly, the world doesn’t need any more assholes. Your father and I expect you to carry yourself in a certain way that not only takes care of you but shows others that you care for them as well.

…I have a very bad habit of eating away my sorrows. I’m working on fixing that but it’s still challenging.

…I cuss. A lot. I’m trying hard to work on this around you but damnit, some habits are hard to break.

…Growing up, your mommy was a HUGE tomboy. Skateboards, playing in creeks and hanging out with the boys in our neighborhood made me the happiest.

…I don’t like raisins and applesauce. Your grandma will try to convince you otherwise).

…I do LOVE Mexican food, Sushi and bacon.

…My biggest pet peeves are people who blow their nose at the dinner table, someone talking to me while I’m trying to read or use the bathroom and liars.

...All I’ve ever needed to know about life can be summed up in this statement: Never let anyone with bad eye brows or an Alabama fan tell you shit about life.

…I am a hopeless optimist. This may very well get on your nerves at times but when you figure out that looking at the glass half full instead of empty makes life a little sweeter and easier, you’ll thank me.