Stop Perpetuating the Lie That Parenting "Gets Easier"

When Maddy was born, I remember having the overwhelming feeling that having a baby was the hardest thing in the world. Being a first-time mom, everything about it seemed difficult; trying to figure out why my baby wouldn’t breastfeed to establishing a sleep routine, the non-stop crying and screaming from gas, the endless mountains of laundry, a bout with post-partum depression, and feeling exhausted and hormonal all the time only solidified my position that caring for a baby was hard. How in the world would I ever make it through? When would I ever come up for air? I remember expressing these thoughts to family and friends who have children and without hesitation, nine out of ten of them would respond with, “Don’t worry, sweetie. It gets easier.”

Looking back, I realize now what my mistake was: I took their sentiment to heart and believed them. I made the mistake of waiting, hoping, and praying for parenting to get easier. And while some aspects of the new mom parenting fog lifted, the actual demands of parenting never really got easier…they just shifted and morphed into new challenges. Bottles and formula turned into solid foods with a picky eater. Diapers turned into potty training challenges. My baby who used to sleep through my night turned into a toddler who didn’t sleep for five years. My easy-going baby morphed into a demon overnight with the onset of the terrible twos and when I really think about it, the threes going into the fours were worse. There was learning how to juggle being a working mom with my new lifestyle, learning how to discipline, and learning how to accommodate a clingy toddler while being able to still have a few slivers of precious me time. My relationships with my friends who didn’t have children changed, and it was no one’s fault. It’s simply what happens when kids come into the picture, but the anxiety of finding supportive mom friends was exhausting. It was all exhausting because here’s the truth that no parent wants to hear or even admit…

Parenting doesn’t get easier. Ever.

I know when you’re in the throes of the newborn days and you haven’t showered in a week and your boobs are constantly out and being sucked on and you’re in it, I mean, really in it, it feels like it’s the hardest damn thing you will ever do and yes, it is. It really is, I don’t take that away from you, but here’s the thing…

There will always be hard things in parenting. Whether it’s an issue you’re dealing with now or even something you can’t imagine that will hit you down the road, one thing’s for sure: there will always be hard times in parenting, they will just look, and be hard, in different ways and yes, while we all go through brief periods of even-keel, smooth sailing, life as a parent, or simply life in general, is anything but care-free; it’s a constant roller coaster ride of up and down emotions and circumstances.  

This is why we need to stop perpetuating the lie, “Don’t worry, sweetie. It gets easier.” It’s a false sense of security, normalcy, and just plain wrong.

Parenting doesn’t get easier. If anything, it just changes its shape and form. At any point of any given day, my almost six-year-old could be the happiest child in the world but have a complete meltdown over what I fix her for dinner. On any given day, I’m forced to juggle being a working mom and keeping my boss happy with trying to also take care of a sick child. On any given day, at any given time, I’m struggling to keep peace in my home as my ever-growing child stretches and tests the bounds of her independence, ever-evolving personality, and strong-willed demeanor. Throw on top of this simply trying to raise a child to learn right from wrong, kindness, empathy, and how to live in the world, and most days, I honestly feel like I’m barely holding on by my fingertips. There simply isn’t one version of hard. It’s all hard.

But there is a silver lining…

While being a parent will never be easy, you will get better. As a parent, you can’t help but to grow and learn from every stage of parenting. Every conflict, battle, argument, sassy attitude, mess, tantrum, and good moment is an opportunity for growth. Every time we yell, or fail, or feel we could have handled a situation differently, we are learning and growing and in return, pathing the path for the future to be a little more tolerable. It’s a constant process of losing and finding ourselves and assessing what parenting looks like in each stage because the reality is, you don’t parent your preschool child the same way you parented your toddler. It’s constantly changing, the way we parent our children, which is why it’s anything but easy.

Instead of waiting for calm, easy waters, I urge each of us to learn to become more of a skilled sailor. Accept that parenting will never “get easier” and work each day to navigate through the ups and downs of this ocean called parenting. Instead of believing falsehoods, let us train our minds to desire what the situation demands of us. No, parenting will never get easier, but we can always strive to become better, and that’s what makes all the difference.

14 Ways to Bring Calm & Peace Into Your Parenting

As moms, we have a wonderful way of beating ourselves up a lot over every little thing. In reading through my social media posts daily, it seems as if this trend of self-shaming has become the rule instead of the exception.

Parenting is hard. It's a crazy combination of feeling like it's the best thing you've ever done with your life coupled with the nagging feeling of, "WTF am I doing/thinking?" While I'm clearly no pro at this parenting gig, I've come to learn a few things over the past five and a half years that help me invite calm and peace into my parenting which in turn, makes a profound difference for both myself, Maddy, and our family. If anything, take comfort in this advice and know that whatever struggle you're going through right now, some mother somewhere is right there with you. You're never, ever alone.   

Not breast feeding isn't the end of the world. Don't ever let anyone make you feel bad for choosing not to do it. The important thing is that your child is fed and is thriving, regardless of the method by which it happens. 

If you have to/want to work, find a day care you, but more importantly, your child loves. It will give you peace of mind while you're away during the day and finding the perfect center is worth its weight in gold.


Live with less. It is amazing how little "stuff" baby and kids really needs and there is no need to go into debt for things that are temporary and will be outgrown/out-used before you know it.

Follow the adage, "Sleep when the baby sleeps." I did the complete opposite as a new mom because I felt like I had to keep all the balls in the air all the time. I got very little accomplished and still wound up frustrated and exhausted. There will always be laundry and housework to do so let it be. 

Follow your gut and intuition. Many people will have an opinion of how you should be taking care of your child(ren), but only you know what is best for you and your kids. It isn't called "Mother's Intuition" for nothing. Trust your gut, that bitch knows what’s up.

Remember you. Do your best to keep up with hobbies and the things you enjoy doing outside of your child. Yes - our children are the priority but for us to be our best selves for them, we need the time and opportunity to remember who our best selves are without our kids. It’s okay to be selfish with ourselves and our time every now and again.


Learn to let go and let your spouse/partner take over. If you're a control freak like me, this will be hard to do at first but in the end, you can't carry everything by yourself. It doesn't matter if the laundry isn't done the way you like or if the kitchen isn't cleaned to your liking. The point is - it's done. You don't have to worry about doing it. Simply be appreciative and move on.


Learn to say "No" more. You don't have to be everything to everyone. Period. 

Find a good set of mom/parent friends. As much as you like to think that your kids won't hinder your relationship with friends who aren't parents, it will. It is the truth and the reality of becoming parents that no one likes to admit or talk about. The bigger reality is that they will have no clue {to no fault of their own} on how to fit in with your new lifestyle. You don't have to lose these friends, but it helps to make new friends too; mommy and parent friends will be able to help you laugh, commiserate, and work your way through parenthood.


Stay off the Internet researching everything under the sun. It will drive you crazy and to madness!! Picture this: there was a time when people managed to raise children successfully without the help of the Internet. Hard to believe I know, but it's true. I found myself spending hours of wasted time in front of my laptop for every little thing that I felt was wrong with me or my child and you know what? In the end, reading things off the Internet only made me feel worse. 


Let the kiddos be young. This is the only time in their life that they can act free and uninhibited. Let them do it! It goes against every fiber of my "everything in its place, neat and tidy" being to let Maddy be messy, but I do it; finger paints, playing in the dirt, the messy room - all of it because bottom line, it's her happiness and in the grand scheme of things, it doesn't matter. It can all be fixed and cleaned, momma. They only get one childhood – let them be little.

Tell your child "No" every now and again. We've all encountered, or had our own kids be “that child.” Enough said.

Be the disciplinarian - not the best friend parent. Bottom line, you have a job to do. Raising a human is no joke, y'all. You will have time to cultivate a friendship with your child when they are an adult. Right now, it's time to take care of business. I didn't understand this growing up with my own parents but I do now that I have my own child and I THANK GOD every day that they understood and implemented this very fine principle for myself and my two sisters. 


And finally, when all else fails, drink a fabulous glass {or two} of wine.


What are your best tips to make it through this journey of parenthood?

Dear Bloggers & Writers: This Isn't "Business As Usual"

I’ve been trying for a while to compose the following thoughts that have been on my mind and to say that it’s been difficult would be a huge understatement. I’ve tried every approach known to man to express what I’m feeling without coming across as harsh but in the end, it doesn’t work. It doesn’t work because I’m not being true to myself and my voice and while yes, my blog is a place where I discuss the ups and downs of parenting, it’s also a place where I discuss life openly, honestly and bravely. I’ve never backed down from this stance so I’m not going to start now.

As you may have noticed lately, our democracy, nation and humanity is imploding. Daily, we are being pushed towards the brink of economic, civil and global disaster. Our government is literally breaking into a million pieces with no relief in sight. Women, families, working parents, children and minorities are under attack like we’ve ever seen pre-Ronald Regan era. Having said all of this, I must ask…

Where are the bloggers and writers?

You have a platform. You have a voice. The two go hand in hand. I know what you’re thinking: “But I don’t do that on my blog or website. I don’t usually write about that.” So, you don’t stand up for what is right? Interesting.

“I have a brand to maintain.” No one cares. Sorry, they don’t. People are living paycheck to paycheck, fretting about how they’re going to afford health insurance and for some families, how they’re going to stay together without being literally ripped apart by Trump’s immigration policy. “The struggle is real” is no longer a cute little hashtag to use for all our perfectly poised pictures but a reality for millions of Americans. It is in fact a “struggle.” So, no. Unless you’re going to tell me how to wear those cute little ankle booties in a march, or which is the best lipstick to wear while telling Trump to pucker up and kiss my ass, or the best scarf selection for those cold morning protests, or the best wine pairings to partake of while planning the resistance, I don’t have time. I’m tired AF seeing recipes, yoga, travel and fashion posts like the damn world isn’t burning to the ground.

And that’s my frustration now. Do I expect that everyone should be posting political commentary 24/7? No. Do I think that on some level we as bloggers and writers should all be standing up to talk about the issues, our fears, and our feelings about recent events? YES. If you can use your platform to sell all kinds of mindless shit no one really needs, pimp brands that do only one thing – make their companies richer, and make a dollar for yourself, then you can use your same influential voice to speak up for the issues and things that truly matter in this life. Here’s how you do it…

Write a post about the organizations you’re supporting right now and why. Actually, DO a comedic piece about which wines, beers or beverages you enjoy while trying to take in the daily news. This is humor and keeping things light while still talking about the issues. Write a post about your recentparticipation in a march or protest and why you decided to be involved. Use your blog to share a sample letter that you can use to send to your local and state representatives. This is the perfect post to share that really reaches those people who may want to be involved but don’t know where to start. If you post DIY material, show us how to make the best political signs. Share your thoughts on an issue that is important to you and why it affects others, good or bad. Share a post on how to spread love and peace during turbulent times. The point is, find a method of support that works for you and DO IT.

But to the bloggers and writers staying “on brand” and operating like business as usual, like nothing is happening? I’m sorry, I can’t support that. The majority of you to whom I speak are women. How can you not speak up? Do you not realize that the only reason you’re able to have a voice, or a business, or a “side hustle” is because of the women who came before you in protest to give it to you? Be brave. Buck up. People want to talk about this! Find your voice and share it because honestly, all our lives are depending on it.

“Our lives end the day we become silent about things that matter.” – Martin Luther King Jr.

I'm a Mom with Depression: 5 Ways I Cope

As most of you may know, I am a mother who battles depression. It's a topic that I've touched on lightly from time to time but in all honesty, I haven't talked about it as much as I should and I feel bad about that and want to change it. I know that depression can be a difficult topic for most mothers to even admit they have, let alone talk about, but the fact of the matter is that this issue simply isn't talked about enough in parenting circles and it should be.

All too often, women and mothers suffer in silence with depression and even though we are in the year 2017, the topic of mothers who suffer from depression is treated as if we're still stuck in the 1950s. It's almost as if it's still the dirty little secret that we're not supposed to talk about, a taboo if you will.

As moms, we become gold medal winners for harboring secrets. Some secrets are small like hiding in the pantry for just a sliver of peace and quiet or how we skip pages of bedtime stories at the end of long days just so we can get the little devils to bed faster and get some much-needed down time. You know, innocent little white lies.

And the bigger secrets? Well, sometimes we just keep those buried deep down inside for fear of them ever seeing the light of day. Worse, we keep them hidden from the world for fear of judgement, ridicule, and unfortunately, to keep from being perceived by others as a mom who can't keep her shit together. You know the secrets I'm talking about - secrets like depression. These secrets stay bubbling just under the surface and in return, cause a slow and painful death to the mothers who hold them in. 

I know because this used to be me.

For the longest time, I felt ashamed because I'm on anti-depressants, sought therapy, and found myself not enjoying every single aspect of being a mom or finding joy with parenthood in general. I think the largest contributor to this was becoming a first-time mom. Right from the moment a woman finds out she's pregnant, most go through the normal nesting process that looks something like this:

• Read all the baby books.
• Take all the classes
• Listen to all the advice of family and friends
• Decorate the nursery & baby proof the home
• Read more baby books

Sound familiar? And while all of this is great {I'm not advocating otherwise} there is absolutely no book, person, or class that can adequately prepare you for the biggest life-altering journey that you are about to embark on - parenthood.

For some first-time mothers, they adjust beautifully but if we're being honest, I think the majority of mothers struggle with becoming a parent and in return, most struggle and fight depression whether it be a single bout of PPD or a depression that lasts longer. And it's easy to see why. You and your partner have just welcomed a new baby {a human life!} into your world and from the moment they are born, your life as you used to know it is gone. It's a very bitter, exhausting, emotionally and physically draining pill to swallow.

So how do we win?

Well, I'll be honest with you - I don't know if anyone ever fully "wins" or beats depression after all, it is a disease that has to be managed just like any illness. And I don't say that to be negative or to be a downer. I say it because it's the truth and it is reality. Depression is silent and deadly and sneaks up on you like a thief in the night and that's its mode of operation - you never know when it is going to sneak back into your life. Having said this, I want to share some tips and pieces of advice that I've learned along the way over my years in dealing with my depression and more so since becoming a mom:

Get Help. There is absolutely no shame in seeking help for depression. If anyone - and I do mean anyone - tells you otherwise, run from them as fast as your feet will take you. If you’re going to tackle your depression, the one thing you have to understand is that IT. IS. A. DISEASE. You can't help your depression any more than you can help the color of your eyes. Look at is this way - if you were a diabetic, wouldn't you take insulin to manage your diabetes to live a happy and productive life? It's the same thing. Depression is a disease and you will need help to fight it. The reality is that you cannot do it on your own. 

Avoid Depression Triggers Like the Plague. Over the many years that I've battled my depression, I've come to find that there are certain things in life that will trigger my depression. And while I can't avoid everything in life, I've come to learn and recognize the things that set me off so that I can avoid the traps and pitfalls that follow. Learn what your triggers are and do your best to avoid them.

Minimize Stress. Ok, I admit - this is a tricky one. Being a parent alone is stressful enough let alone dealing with depression however, I believe most stress incurred in our lives is brought on by none other than ourselves. Sometimes we are our own worst enemies. Learn to recognize your limits and stick to them. You have to be willing to put yourself and your well-being first if you truly want to battle depression successfully. There is absolutely no shame in not juggling it all. If you take anything away from this post please let it be this - you can't be everything to everyone. Learn what your strengths and weaknesses are and use them to your advantage. If this means cutting back on commitments or telling people "No" then DO. IT. Life will go on and the world will keep spinning, I promise. I've always maintained that I'd rather do a few things well then do a lot of things that turn out to be crap. 

Build A Strong Support Group & Network. It's nice to have friends or family who can spill out the generic platitudes when you're suffering with depression. That's great, and I don't take anything away from their efforts, but it’s essential to find people, friends, or professionals who are going through the same battles you are who are able to truly understand what you're going through and need in order to battle your depression. It's true that these people may not be able to immediately fix what's wrong but they will certainly be the ones who will rally beside you when times get hard and you will know that they are coming from a perspective of experience instead of just trying to get you to "snap out of it." Having a network that is a safe place for you to be able to express yourself freely without fear of retribution is priority number one in managing your depression.

Do Not be Afraid to Rely on Medicine. Depression is a beast. It is unforgiving and it is relentless and while that organic herbal rub may work great for your cuts, sores, and glowing complexion it's not going to do much to get you through your depression. Get rest and exercise and if need be, get medicine. There is no shame in this! If you had a migraine, would you let yourself suffer? Modern medicine is a marvelous thing. There are so many advances and choices now in the world of depression meds that many have minimal to no side effects. I take one pill daily that has changed my life dramatically and for the better. It doesn't interfere with my life at all. In some ways, it has given me my life back. Don't be afraid to talk to your doctor to find the best med{s} that works best for you.

Last but certainly not least, take each day one at a time. Learning to live with and battle depression as a mother is a journey. Learn to be honest with yourself and accept that some days will be good and others...well...not so much. And you know what? There's nothing wrong with that - it's okay. There is nothing "wrong" with you. You are beautifully created women doing amazing work in your homes and in the world. Sometimes we all need a little help and there is no shame in that.

I hope that by talking about depression, I can connect with other moms who are going through the same struggles and who are in the same boat of fighting depression, anxiety, irritability, and the sadness that creeps into our lives, mostly inexplicably. Moms who wonder why - even when their lives seem to be picture perfect - why do they feel this way? I had a therapist once who told me that every mother she counsels asks this very same question.

So know that if you're asking it too, you're not alone and it's okay. I hope this post helps you to know and understand this and encourages you to share your own stories so that we can begin to chip away at this horrible and unfounded stigma of depression.

Why I Marched: Women's March on Washington - Pittsburgh

This weekend, I had the honor of marching in the Women’s March on Washington in Pittsburgh. To say it was an amazingly powerful day would be a huge understatement. Honestly, I don’t know if there’s one word, or any blog post, that could accurately describe the meaning and impact of Saturday. Not only did women from all over our country march, but women from all over the WORLD participated; France, Australia, South Africa, Great Britain, New Zealand, and every state in the USA, some states with multiple marches. Powerful, right? This global initiative simply proves the WORLD’S hesitation, fear and disgust of our new President and his administration.

Before I go any further, let me share with you the mission of the Women’s March so you know how it got started so you can understand its importance. From the Women’s March Facebook page:

“On January 21, 2017 we will unite in Washington, DC for the Women’s March on Washington. We stand together in solidarity with our partners and children for the protection of our rights, our safety, our health, and our families, recognizing that our vibrant and diverse communities are the strength of our country.

The rhetoric of the past election cycle has insulted, demonized, and threatened many of us: immigrants of all statuses, Muslims and those of diverse religious faiths, people who identify as LGBTQIA, Native people, Black and Brown people, people with disabilities, and survivors of sexual assault. Our communities are hurting and scared. We are confronted with the question of how to move forward in the face of national and international concern and fear. 

In the spirit of democracy and in honor of the champions of human rights, dignity, and justice who have come before us, we join in diversity to show our presence in numbers too great to ignore. The Women’s March on Washington will send a bold message to our new administration on their first day in office, and to the world, that women’s rights are human rights. We stand together, recognizing that defending the most marginalized among us is defending all of us. 

We support the advocacy and resistance movements that reflect our multiple and intersecting identities. We call on all defenders of human rights to join us. This march is the first step towards unifying our communities, grounded in new relationships, to create change from the grassroots level up. We will not rest until women have parity and equity at all levels of leadership in society. We work peacefully while recognizing there is no true peace without justice and equity for all. HEAR OUR VOICE.”

Considering that all women are different, have different lifestyles and different things that affect them, their families and their friends daily, it’s hard to say *this* is the reason all women marched. I can only tell you why *I* marched. It’s not because I’m a “sore loser” or a “cry baby.” It’s not because I see life through rose-colored glasses and expect everything in life to be fair all the time and go my way, and it’s not because I’m a “whiny liberal.”

It’s quite the opposite, really.

I marched because I care about our country and all its people. I marched for those asking, “Will my marriage still be legal?” I marched for those asking, “How will I be able to afford health care for me and my family?” I marched for those worried about their safety as a woman, man or child of color. I marched for all the moms who send their children off to school every day asking, “Will my transgender child be safe at school?” I marched for women everywhere asking, “Will Roe vs. Wade be overturned? What about my rights for my own body?” I marched for families wondering where they will find and desperately seeking affordable, safe housing. I marched for those worried and concerned about the increase of militarization of police. I marched for those individuals struggling to make it through the day with mental illness who have no resources or funds to take care of themselves.

I marched because I care about women and the struggles, that even in the year 2017, we still face daily. I care about how women are treated and viewed. I care about being seen in a world where women and young girls are told and taught to stop being bossy, stop making a scene, and don’t rock the boat. Be a lady. I marched because we now have a President and administration who proved time and time again through their campaign in talk and in action how little respect they have for women, people of color, people with disabilities, and those with differing religious views.

Most of all, I marched for my own daughter.

I want my daughter to know that she is her own divine creature in this world. She is strong, brave, courageous and important. I want her to know that it’s no one’s business but her own what she does with her body, including her choice to carry or not carry a child. I want her to know without a shadow of a doubt that she is free, empowered and a powerful force to be reckoned with in this life. I want her – and all young girls – to know that myself and millions of other women fought for them, their rights, and their futures – just like the generations of women who came before us. 

So, no. I won’t simply “be quiet” or “just move on” or “accept it.” There’s nothing more beautiful in our country than peaceful, organized, legal dissent and democracy in action. You know what's not so beautiful? That people apparently have a HUGE problem with women stepping up to the plate STILL in the year 2017 and that’s unfortunate. I am prepared to fight back and will keep doing so until my last breath. Keep marching, keep speaking, keep going.

"A woman is like a tea bag—you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water." 

—Eleanor Roosevelt

It's Okay to Celebrate Christmas NOW!

I’ve noticed an interesting trend happening lately in the social media world that I’ve come to dub as holiday shaming. 

Over the past couple of weeks since Halloween, I’ve witnessed a large number of people going insane – I mean, losing their shit insane – over the mere presence and mention of anything to do with Christmas or “holiday” related items, whether it be the sighting of a hanging wreath, to radio stations playing Christmas music, to stores decorating for the holidays, but especially, friends posting their own holiday and Christmas decorations on Facebook and Instagram. And those poor folks? Those poor guys are taking a beating. 

Lately, I’ve read comments on pictures that have been posted by those who’ve decided to start celebrating Christmas and the holiday season to include:

“Are you serious?! Christmas decorations already? Um, hello crazy! We’re not there yet!”

“Maybe you’re too dumb to read a calendar but it’s just November.”

“So disrespectful and rude!” (Made in reference to a picture of a wreath hanging on a friend’s front door)

Aside from my sheer disbelief that anyone could be so riled up over something so silly, what baffles and upsets me even more are the responses from those being trolled. These people are taking down their decorations, turning off their holiday music and deleting their festive photos. What’s worse, they are apologizing – yes apologizing – for simply exercising their right to celebrate what they believe and the ones who stand their ground and post pictures anyway feel the need to preface their photos or shares with comments like, “I know, I know Christmas is still a month away” or “Don’t judge” or worse, “Okay you guys, don’t get mad at me but I was so proud of myself for making our wreath that I wanted to share this picture!”

Why are we doing this to each other?

I get it. Christmas can be materialistic. The meaning gets lost in the commercialism of it all. Let’s get through Thanksgiving first.

I hear you.

I truly do.

However…

How is someone else’s joy in celebrating the holiday season (And it is a season. That’s important to note. November through December is the holiday SEASON) impeding on your life? How is someone’s choice to hang a decoration here and there affecting what you believe and how you carry on your day to day life? So your neighbor sets up and decorates their Christmas tree. 

So what? Whatever happened to the simple concept of live and let live?

Here’s a little confession for you guys: When we set up our Christmas tree last year, I kept that baby sparked up until the end of June. Why? Because it made me happy, it made my daughter happy and it brought joy to our home, plain and simple, and I make ZERO apologies for it because here’s the thing…

I never wanted that good feeling to end. Yes, in the times we live in, the holidays can be stressful and consuming but I’ve often found far more joy in the holiday season than bad. It’s the one time of year where you can actually see the good in humanity come out. People extend beyond themselves to reach out to others and often times, you will witness many a “Christmas miracle” happen. I love the joy and wonderment in our children’s eyes as they marvel at all the season has to offer but most importantly, the season centers me and makes me feel whole as a human again. It does, it really does. I’m reminded of how eternally blessed I am and how I have the opportunity to bless others’ lives as well. It is truly a miraculous time of year. 

And honestly, with everything going on in our world today, couldn’t we all use a little more joy and peace on earth? I think so.

Do you want to know what I think? I think we are a country full of people just looking for any reason at all to be offended. I think there are people everywhere who crave an opportunity to complain. I also think we are bogged down and overrun with bullies.

That’s right – bullies. Holiday shaming bullies.

I take nothing away from those who feel the celebration of Christmas shouldn’t begin until December, I really don’t. You're entitled to believe and practice what you want. What I do have a problem with are the actions these same people take in making others – who have the right to celebrate when and how they choose – feel bad about themselves and their choices and quite honestly, if you’re one of the Judgy McJudgersons reading this who think it’s fun to holiday shame, you should probably know that your actions of anger, judgment and belittlement towards another say far more about you and your character than the people who choose to celebrate. 

#justsayin

To those of you who are currently celebrating the holiday season I say: Wave your Christmas flag high and proud. Slap up those wreaths and blast that Christmas music. Bake till your little heart’s content and whip out those holiday crafts with the kiddos because really, what you’re doing shouldn’t matter to anyone else but you, and your actions are hurting no one. 

More importantly in your joy of celebrating the holiday season, don’t forget to…

Share the true meaning of the season with those you love and those who might be a little harder to love. Donate to the less fortunate and give to those in need. Volunteer your time and resources to an organization in your community. Feed a hungry family. Provide toys and clothing for Christmas morning for children who are less fortunate. Visit the elderly and the sick. 

Revel and immerse yourselves into the true meaning of the season because trust me, our country can use all the love you have to give. To quote the Vince Guaraldi Trio:

“Oh that we could always see such spirit through the year…”